


Catch Me If You Can

by sharedwithyou



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst and Humor, Crowley Being an Asshole, Crowley and Feelings, Crowley is a Little Shit, F/M, Humor, Mindfuck, Mostly humor, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-18
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-09 14:52:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7806193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharedwithyou/pseuds/sharedwithyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“We don’t want to hurt you, but we will.”<br/>That one was Sam, you think. Less cutthroat of the two, his stature made him more formidable than his reputation would lead you to believe.<br/>“Come on, Sam. Just get the knife so we can make this birdy chirp.”<br/>Dean, presumably. For all the machismo he liked to exude, that necklace sure was girly.<br/>So these were the Wonder Boys.</p>
<p>I mean, they had caught you, so there was some credit there.<br/>But if they had been trying for Crowley… well, then epic fail.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Wheeeee
> 
> some more crowley drabble/bullshittery   
> definitely going to have a few chapters, this one, but i'm putting up the little intro first. give me some love guys it helps me write faster!!
> 
> suspension of disbelief, yadayada, enjoy!!
> 
> XOXO Bucky the Mindfucker (i'm not changing my pseud because people might get confused, but we all know this is my name, so hah)

 

 

Some say the Winchesters are the best damn hunters out there.

Then again some say that ketchup is the best condiment of all time.

You liked mustard.

 

“We don’t want to hurt you, but we will.”

That one was Sam, you think. Less cutthroat of the two, his stature made him more formidable than his reputation would lead you to believe.

“Come on, Sam. Just get the knife so we can make this birdy chirp.”

Dean, presumably. For all the machismo he liked to exude, that necklace sure was girly.

So these were the Wonder Boys.

 

I mean, they had caught you, so there was some credit there.

But if they had been trying for Crowley… well, then epic fail.

 

“Name your poison. Salt, holy water? Or maybe a good old fashioned…” Buzz cut made a flick of the wrist that cast a nice little shadow in the moonlight.

“Dealer’s choice.” You offered, admiring your nails as they spread out from where your wrists had been tied.

“Spunky. I like it.” He picked up a bottle and you cringed, your I-could-care-less attitude ruined by your lack of pain-tolerance. The King always mocked you for that.

The boy, on the other hand, grinned a Cheshire-smile that could mimic the devil. Maybe they were more alike than he knew.

“Tell us what you know, and we’ll let you go.” The baby Winchester seemed to have less stomach for…punishment.

You smirked.

 

“I’m not really one for deals. That’s Crowley’s forte, isn’t it.”

 

You hissed a second later when a splash of holy water hit you in the neck.

“We’re not playing here.” Clearly.

“I’d tell you I don’t know anything, but I doubt you’d believe me.”

“Damn right.” Dean shook the bottle, beckoning for you to spill. You almost laughed.

“Well, then, spray away. I have nothing to say.” You spoke through gritted teeth as the skin along your arms burned from another wave of water.

“Can’t or won’t?” Tall boy grasped his brother’s arm to give you a moment to breathe. How kind.

“Does it matter?” Abercrombie wrenched free at your words and sent a scalding blow into your stomach. “Shit!”

“That’s right. It’s gonna hurt until you tell us what we want to know.”

You scoffed. “I doubt you’d stop even if I gave you what you wanted.”

“Oh really?”

 

“You seem to have taken a liking to torture,” you drawled with a grin, earning a knife in your knee. Ow. “Wasn’t that your job not too long ago?”

 

“Listen to me-“ Blue-eyes got real close to you with the dagger, but Moose pulled him back.

“Dean. We need her alive.”

“Why?! She’s obviously not talking. She’s useless.”

“Not to mention you could kill me after I told you what you wanted to hear,” you added helpfully. “So I might as well stay mum about it.”

 

“Well, then, I guess I’ll just kill you now.”

 

He advanced towards you, the light catching on the blade as he twirled it between his fingers. Artistic license?

The Winchesters were unique, to be sure. You admired their flair.

“Dean, we have to go.” Sam held up his flashing phone. “There’s been another attack; the demons are probably still on the scene.”

“Just let me kill this bitch first.”

“Come on, Dean!!” Was Sammy too soft to be a good hunter? “There’s no time. You can come back later if you really want to. She’s not going anywhere.”

Dean cursed under his breath and gripped his knife tightly, wanting to drive it into your heart.

You gave him a magnanimous smile in response.

“Fine. But we’re definitely coming back.” He spoke authoritatively, letting Sam know he wasn’t finished with you just yet.

 

“Toodles, then.” You winked at the boys as they grabbed their gear and rushed out, their little bottoms wiggling all the way.

 

Well, that was an experience, at least.

 

 

“Ironic, innit? For someone who squeals at the tiniest pinch you haven’t squealed about me yet. I suppose I should be grateful.”

 

 

“Crowley, what the fuck took so long?!”

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some more drabble with a bit more crowley  
> we'll see when inspiration strikes again ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little addendum to our adventures with the hunters and the king of hell
> 
> leave me a comment if you liked!!
> 
> XOXO Bucky

“Sorry for the delay, love, I had a few things to take care of.” He stayed behind you out of sight, but that inimitable croon was his alone.

“I see saving me wasn’t exactly a priority.”

“Now, now, you’re still alive aren’t you? Let’s look on the bright side.”

God help you for hanging around this bastard. Then again, God really had nothing to do with it.

 

 

“Before we’re old?” You wiggled against the restraints impatiently.

“Ah, but we are. Not exactly ancient, but we’ve been around awhile.”

You leaned your head back and groaned; he was the Devil and there was no two ways around it.

“You’re tense, darling. Too much tension in the shoulders, I’d say.”

“I’m tied up.” You replied shortly. He tsked, and placed his hands against your shoulder blades and applied slight pressure. “Oof!”

“They did a number on you, didn’t they?”

“Take a look around. Not exactly Waldorf.”

“Hmm.” He circled around slowly until you was in front of you. “Quite a nasty burn you’ve got there.”

“Okay, Doctor. You going to fix me up or should I get a spot on the skin graft list?” Your voice grew testy. It was one thing to wait until the last minute to come get you; it was another entirely to keep you tied up after the fact.

The former was his style of foreplay. The latter was him being a dick.

“Don’t get mouthy, darling. I’m the one with the key to your chains, aren’t I?”

You rolled your eyes and forcefully rocked against the chair; if he wasn’t going to help, you could at least break out of the chair for some leg room.

“What’s the matter? Did I hurt your feelings?” He teased, watching you scooch backwards from the momentum.

“Nothing doing.” You growled as you felt the chair creak. Almost there…

 

“Shit!”

 

You tipped back hard enough to crack your head open, but felt his arms catch you before you hit the ground.

“It’s called gravity, love.”

“And you’re called a jerk.” You grumbled, as he ran his fingers against your neck, removing all traces of the holy water.

“Fair enough. It’s been a rough night for us all.” He bent down to nuzzle your chin the way you loved. You hated how easily you forgave him.

“Rough for you?! I’m the one who’s been showered in that poison.”

“Believe it or not, I don’t exactly like seeing you in this state either.” He murmured as he finally broke your restraints.

“Glad to see you care.” You couldn’t help the bitter sarcasm from seeping in; he was the King of Hell and nothing beyond power really concerned him.

He leaned in to whisper in your ear. “Oh, but I do. And I’ll make those boys pay for leaving a mark on my little (y/n).”

“You better.”

He raised his eyebrows at your bossy tone, but your baleful pout made him grin nonetheless.

So he put his lips back to your neck and kissed it until the spot turned purple, before giving it a final nip.

 

 

“I want everyone to see this. You’re mine, and mine alone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEEEEEE
> 
> give me a shout-out below!!!
> 
> quick poll 1: WHOOOOOO (if this turns into a long fic, literally ANYONE is up for grabs)
> 
> The former was his style of foreplay. The latter was him being a dick.~ i assume usually it would be the opposite, but hey it's my fic ;) besides crowley waiting til the last minute to get you because its his way of flirting is kind of poetic  
> or kinky  
> whichever
> 
> quick poll 2: predictions/ideas?
> 
> til next time lovelies!!!
> 
>  
> 
> XOXO Bucky the Mindfucker

**Author's Note:**

> just a little bit of musing before we get started ;)
> 
> leave me a comment lovelies!! and check out my other angsty crowley fic if you love him like i do ;) or my other shit if you like dean/sammy/cas  
> especially cas. yum.
> 
> random ramblings:  
> quick poll 1: what would you like to see happen/predictions for next chapter? should this evolve into a love triangle somehow?! (god help me if it does)
> 
> fyi it's you yelling at him at the end. not the boys coming back and finding crowley. so yeah. lots more to write don't worry i'll figure it out
> 
>  
> 
> til next time lovelies!!
> 
> XOXO Bucky
> 
> p.s. from now on i'm writing innit instead of 'isn't it' for crowley. since that's how he says it. one of my friends started typing like that, and it totally makes sense. wheee.


End file.
